Say what? The Pilot Episode
All you ladies out there who are mommies already will surely enjoy this.
The comments and advice have begun, already. And so far, they have been astonishing. I will share a few with you from time to time throughout my pregnancy, starting with these.
Get a load of this.
Me: "Hi there, ______. It's so good to see you...I'm expecting my first child this summer, and I'm thrilled!"
Response 1: "Ohhhhh! when did you get married?"
Response 2: "How old are you again, 45?"
Response 3: "Your life is officially over, so get used to it."
Response 4: "You'll be a great mother, raising kids is just like raising puppies."
Response 5: "How are your nipples?"
Response 6: "You had better hope you don't have a tilted uterus."
Response 7: "Wow. I thought you didn't want kids."
Response 8: "Wow. I thought you were too old to have kids."
Response 9: "You don't look pregnant."
(And now for my all-time favorite response so far, this one spoken by blood-kin in such hushed tones that it may never reach the tender ears of Jesus Himself)
Response 5: "Uh-huh...who's the father?"
The comments and advice have begun, already. And so far, they have been astonishing. I will share a few with you from time to time throughout my pregnancy, starting with these.
Get a load of this.
Me: "Hi there, ______. It's so good to see you...I'm expecting my first child this summer, and I'm thrilled!"
Response 1: "Ohhhhh! when did you get married?"
Response 2: "How old are you again, 45?"
Response 3: "Your life is officially over, so get used to it."
Response 4: "You'll be a great mother, raising kids is just like raising puppies."
Response 5: "How are your nipples?"
Response 6: "You had better hope you don't have a tilted uterus."
Response 7: "Wow. I thought you didn't want kids."
Response 8: "Wow. I thought you were too old to have kids."
Response 9: "You don't look pregnant."
(And now for my all-time favorite response so far, this one spoken by blood-kin in such hushed tones that it may never reach the tender ears of Jesus Himself)
Response 5: "Uh-huh...who's the father?"
posted by Reality Chick at 12:30 PM
11 Comments:
LOL! People will say the darndest, rudest, things. I know I had my share of them. Lots of unwanted advice, especially on the name. I finally just had to say, this is what we are naming her and I don't care your opinion on it! ha People don't realzie they are being obnoxious I guess. Keep us posted, these are funny
just wait...it gets better, especially when people start comments on "how huge!" you are and saying stuff like "what are you 8 months now?" and you are merely five months pregnant and you tell them you are due in May and they say "are you sure its not March?" oh, and you get 12 wks maternity leave from work and they ask "we need to plan when you will take your six wks off for having the baby, you know, if you are even going to be gone that long." EXCUSE ME!!! the joys of people and their big mouths.
how far along are you?
I'm 11 weeks give or take. I will know more after the next ultrasound...
I'm showing just a bit, but I can still wear my regular clothes. I know this will not last long, LOL
HA!HA!HA!HA! The last comment slays me...let me guess, you should've told HER, "No ma'am I don't. But have you ever watched that show that comes on in the afternoon, you know the Maury show? Well, I've already signed up and they're gone help me find my baby's daddy!"
LOVE YOU SO MUCH! just laugh at 'em!
Melanie is killing me!!!!! :)
People can be so ignorant.
When I was pregnant I got so tired of un-wanted advice. Not from friends and family either, just random people I would see.
I am so happy for you I don't know what to do!! I love you. :)
Some people are so freakin' rude!! And really and truly I don't think they know what they sound like when they open their mouths... Otherwise surely they would just keep them shut!
My favorite from this pregnancy has to be "you must be the laziest woman that I know... Otherwise you would've already had that baby..." Had we not been in church, it would've been bad news for him...
Keep your head up, don't let em get you down!;)
Thanks for the support, all you little mommas...
I'll be keeping y'all posted about all things baby. I'm getting more and more excited each day, heehee!
Girlfriend, You should know by now the kind of comments that will come from the people in THAT TOWN. Ignore them. The best comments are the ones that go "I am so happy for you!" and you know that they mean it.
PS... Im hoping for a little girl
Love ya!
Niakki
After reading this, being the smart ass that I am, I immediately had responses pop into my head. I figured you might appreciate these you could have used on those people.
1) Married? I chewed his head off after we MATED!
2) Yes, but I don't feel a day over 60.
3) My life has been over, now I am just pulling the dirt into my grave.
4) Great! I always wanted to rub someones nose in pee and poo while spanking them, saying "BAD DOG"!
5) Still attached.
6) At this point, I'm just glad it works.
7) I don't! How do I get out of this? Please help me!
8)My mental age is 12, I thought I was too young.
9) Can you keep a secret? I'm not pregnant, I'm just doing this for the attention.
10) Father? I thought this was caused by masterbation!
Some of these may not be funny to others but I am laughing in my head. Then again, that is my happy place.
Enjoy every bit of this time. You are entering what is going to be the happiest and most rewarding times of your life.
Always a friend,
Neal
Holy freakin' crap, Neal!
You. Are. Crazy. and very good at snappy comebacks! I must say my favorite is #10, followed closely by 1, 3, and 9.
You rock. Seriously.
And thanks for what you said about momma...I know she's watching over me now ;)
If you smiled, my job here is done.
Neal
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