Yeeeeeehaw y'all
As I type, rodeo goers from across the country are converging on our small town in SE Arkansas. Our 57th Annual PRCA Rodeo starts tonight, and wooooo-doggies, everyone in town seems to be a flutter.
We folks down here in the South would call this influx of outsiders 'a happenin'. It's 'a happenin' alright. Just stopped by the arena moments ago to invite some folks to be on the morning show. While I was talking to the announcer's wife, Mrs. Todd, I noticed several things...things that effectively told me I was NOT cut out for the rodeo circuit.
1. The Heat - As I stepped from my car, I realized that the wave of furnace-like air that engulfed me was the temperature at which I would have to conduct my job, ALL SUMMER LONG. Most of the folks there were feeding/washing their horses/ponies in the near 100 degree heat. Not only does the heat increase my sweatiness, but it also magnifies the effectiveness of my number two (no pun) reason for not being a full-time cowgirl.
2. The Poo - What do you get when you combine sub-tropical humidity, 100+ temps, and livestock? Stank. That's right people...pure, unadulterated stank. Now, I live in and was raised in the country, and we had the whole animal farm thing going on when I was young. But, for the life of me, I DO NOT remember the stench ever being that bad. And trust me, there is no smell on earth like really fresh, really abundant shig pit. But to live with said funk every single day would eventually cauterize the smell receptors in my nose, rendering me olfactory-inept. Nooooo stank you.
3. The Clothing - When you think of cowboys and cowgirls, you usually envision big hats, boots and wrangler-jeans-so-tight-you-must-have-been-born-in-them. I own boots, in fact, lots of them. I love boots...but only in the winter when my stubby little toes need protection from frostbite, or when I ride my iron horse. Having to voluntarily don boots every day would be a real disaster for me. But as I walked around the grounds of the arena, I notice that my bronze-metallic-snakeskin-strappy-heeled sandals were getting rather dusty, and my heels kept sinking in despite the years of training by mother to 'walk on your toes' so as not to skin the delicate leather stretched over said heels. I cannot give up my right to wear heels, year round. I simply would not survive the loss. Just call me Carrie-Imelda-Syl Burt. I love my shoes folks.
As much as I love my heritage, and my country-ness, I could never be a cowgirl in any real sense. So I will leave it to the resilient entourage camped out at Cap Gates Arena. I really admire them all for sticking to their raising, and continuing to bring their sport to the urban masses. It's hard, hot, stanky, thankless work...and they make it look easy. My hats off to you all.
We folks down here in the South would call this influx of outsiders 'a happenin'. It's 'a happenin' alright. Just stopped by the arena moments ago to invite some folks to be on the morning show. While I was talking to the announcer's wife, Mrs. Todd, I noticed several things...things that effectively told me I was NOT cut out for the rodeo circuit.
1. The Heat - As I stepped from my car, I realized that the wave of furnace-like air that engulfed me was the temperature at which I would have to conduct my job, ALL SUMMER LONG. Most of the folks there were feeding/washing their horses/ponies in the near 100 degree heat. Not only does the heat increase my sweatiness, but it also magnifies the effectiveness of my number two (no pun) reason for not being a full-time cowgirl.
2. The Poo - What do you get when you combine sub-tropical humidity, 100+ temps, and livestock? Stank. That's right people...pure, unadulterated stank. Now, I live in and was raised in the country, and we had the whole animal farm thing going on when I was young. But, for the life of me, I DO NOT remember the stench ever being that bad. And trust me, there is no smell on earth like really fresh, really abundant shig pit. But to live with said funk every single day would eventually cauterize the smell receptors in my nose, rendering me olfactory-inept. Nooooo stank you.
3. The Clothing - When you think of cowboys and cowgirls, you usually envision big hats, boots and wrangler-jeans-so-tight-you-must-have-been-born-in-them. I own boots, in fact, lots of them. I love boots...but only in the winter when my stubby little toes need protection from frostbite, or when I ride my iron horse. Having to voluntarily don boots every day would be a real disaster for me. But as I walked around the grounds of the arena, I notice that my bronze-metallic-snakeskin-strappy-heeled sandals were getting rather dusty, and my heels kept sinking in despite the years of training by mother to 'walk on your toes' so as not to skin the delicate leather stretched over said heels. I cannot give up my right to wear heels, year round. I simply would not survive the loss. Just call me Carrie-Imelda-Syl Burt. I love my shoes folks.
As much as I love my heritage, and my country-ness, I could never be a cowgirl in any real sense. So I will leave it to the resilient entourage camped out at Cap Gates Arena. I really admire them all for sticking to their raising, and continuing to bring their sport to the urban masses. It's hard, hot, stanky, thankless work...and they make it look easy. My hats off to you all.
posted by Reality Chick at 9:48 AM
5 Comments:
poo is THE number one reason i don't do rodeos or fairs. nothing makes me gag faster than the smell of sweltering poop. too funny
yucky animal poop! ew! i completely agree about the shoes...when i lived in DC, i refused to be practical and wear tennis shoes to walk to work. i arrived with my heels on and horrible shin splints daily. :)
The HEAT and the mosquitos--not to mention the stank--are so bad!! It's keeping me from going. I just don't remember it being THIS HOT when I was a kid. I guess I just didn't notice it.
I never was the cowgirl type. I did own 1 pair of ropers and 1 pair of rocky mountain jeans! AHHHHh The jeans were so tight! I think I just wanted those b/c of who I was dating at the time...not for me! No hot poop for me either! :)
Ro-de-o; HELL NO!!! pewww!
Post a Comment
<< Home