At least the kid is normal

When you come from a family like mine, the word 'normal' isn't usually a commonly used descriptive in regard to our character. Clannish, hospitable, and 'just plain nuts' are used much more often. I suppose most outsiders look at our family with stunned disbelief, jaw dragging the ground and think, "Do these people really think they are special or something?" Well, yes, we do actually...that is, if you are thinking short-bus-variety-special. Yes, we are different, but none of us really know exactly why.

Ask anyone who has visited my parents' home during their lifetime, and they can tell you. Or find out from someone who once attended any of the myriad family functions at Cooter, particularly The Easter Egg Hunt, and they will explain. Not to mention all the food-laden extravaganzas at Nanie's house where everyone was expected to eat until bursting, family or not.

We just love everyone and make everyone feel welcome. Honestly, we do. We laugh all the time about everything, and yes, we make fun of each other face to face, and no feelings ever get hurt. Just ask Michelle about the Spread Tooth Song, and she won't cry or slap you silly...she'll sing it to you, with accompaniment if a piano is available. Everyone has nicknames, like Fig, Stretch Armstrong, Snick Snoid, Jazz, Face, Micheline, Wha-wha-wha? and my all-time favorite, Bowl-Sock-Sandal. Not all these nicknames were meant to be complimentary, but we didn't care! We were all raised with an extra-large sense of humor. Apparently, laughter IS the best medicine, even though the majority are inside jokes.

Speaking of medicine, I got the results for my quad-screen blood test today. The test is meant to screen for genetic abnormalities by measuring certain protein levels in my blood. Thankfully, the test was negative, giving a good indication that my little bambino is doing well. So even though momma may be 'teched' just a little bit, the kid should suffer no ill effects from my psychosis. I can only hope that my little one will enjoy a childhood like mine, with lots of laughter, singing, nicknames and Easter Egg Hunts. But there is NO WAY that he/she will be allowed to jump out the top of Papaw's barn, with or without the help of an umbrella or homemade parachute. Batman has retired, and Mary Poppins is over-rated.

The following is a list of things that only the family would understand. If I leave anything out, please comment and tell me what I forgot. Just needed to do a little reminiscing today.

- Blind man's bluff in the hall

- Playing 'library'...what was your pretend name?

- T holding the football for Snick to 'practice punt'

- The Playroom, nuff said.

- Running to Ma and Pa's house for a cold biscuit

- Roller Skate Obstacle Course!!! With M Factor and Cinderella on the turntable...LOL

- Me and Mel getting our Barbies mixed up, and fighting about it

- Jumping off the ladder onto the donut swing, what a rush!

- "I was walkin', down a one-way street...BAM! Nanie, there's just something about this house."

- Playing 'King Cobra' and 'D. Faye' on the trampoline

- Cat's Eye, Life, and Hungry Hippos

- "Aaaaaannnniieee!!! OOoooooovvveeeerrrr....Pigtails!"

- The Go-Cart. No, I couldn't ride it because I was too fat.

- The Go-Cart. Attacked Michelle and nearly choked her to death with her own scarf.

- "Polly, there's a snake on my arm."

- Playing 'house' in the pigpen. Yes, the pigpen.

- Janet and me riding one-eyed Lady, the pony.

- Crawfishing with Bob in the front ditch.

- "Momma, Mitchell called me hoss!"

- Hope-toe.

- Mitch drying his hair out the window of the 442, while I steered one-handed.

I love y'all. Thanks for all the funny, happy memories.

Janet and me, circa 1975.